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About Me Member Multimedia Artist Parys Carpenter18/Female/United States Recent Activity Deviant for 2 Years
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Oh Boy

Fri Jan 22, 2010, 7:20 PM
My stepmom gave birth to a baby boy last night.Now I have five biological siblings,a stepbrother,and now a half brother.

I don't know what to think frankly,first thought that comes to mind is I get no attention from my father as is and I have to share him with another sibling.My hatred of his mother isn't helping either..I keep telling myself that the baby has done nothing wrong that I shouldn't hate it.

But dammit this woman took my father away from my family then I get him back for a very short while and she took him away again..Now this baby is going to keep him away from me..

I know I'm being selfish but I haven't felt loved by my father in over a year and a half.The day before he left is the last time I felt like he cared... As stupid as it sounds I just want my daddy to love me again.I've been trying so damn hard and now that baby is gonna make it so it's all in vain. As horrid as it sounds everytime I think of that baby I imagine myself picking it up and throwing it.Why?

Because if I hurt the baby it'd hurt my stepmom too it'd hurt my dad but he's hurt me so much lately that I don't care.

I didn't go to the hospital to see the baby cause if my stepmom looks at me wrong I'm scared I might snap...I've been having some rather violent thoughts and dreams involving her lately...including that baby scenairio.

I know I should be happy but I can't help but feel a mixture of anger and pain.He left my family and replacing us with a new one...Why weren't we good enough ya know? What did I do wrong?

He ran off and married this woman who is only eight years older then I am...He's twelve years older then her...It's causing me a lot of loathing torwards someone who as of right now is inoccent.

Yes I'm in thearpy and yes I have told her these things she suggested staying away from dad all together..But I can't do that I love my dad...and I'll proabaly learn to love my half brother but right now the thought is unfathomable.

Also after watching the birth of five others a new baby looses it's thrill.

  • Mood: Shame

deviantID

I'm a 17 year old aspiring to be a COMIC artist.As you can see I have a long way to go.One friend described me as a ferret lover with a passion for the 80's which is me in a nutshell.
I have some issuses though I tend to keep the off the internet,unless I really need to get something of my chest and I consider you a close friend you'll proabaly hear about it.Sorry guys,you know who ya are>>

I'm one of those people that'd rather draw fanart or her favorite show/cartoon/comic/novel characters rather then their own.

Also I like hetalia as if that isn't obvious this however does not make me ignorant.I am fully aware of how inaccurate it is and don't use it as my history text book.I read it because it amuses me and having faces to put with the countries makes history that much more interesting.I'm tired of hearing about how hetalia is "WWII for babies and ignorant fangirls".That's all 'kay thanks bye now.

Devious Info

  • Current Residence: Born in Cali residing in Wyoming Heading to Estonia
  • Interests: History,Drawing,Sculpting,Learning new things
  • Favourite movie: War of The Worlds,Titanic,Kung Fu Panda,Pagemaster,Hecules,and Peter Pan
  • Favourite band or musician: Various 80's artists I'm also fond of JT
  • Favourite genre of music: I Like just about anything except for metal and screamo
  • Favourite artist: Anyone who I feel I can learn from,namely comic artists.
  • Favourite style of art: Anything that impresses in otherwords anything but abstract and most anime
  • MP3 player of choice: They keep breaking on me so I dun really have a fave
  • Wallpaper of choice: Whatever I'm into at the moment Currently it's Voltron
  • Skin of choice: My own???
  • Favourite game: whatever I'm playing at the moment which rarely is the latest thing.
  • Favourite gaming platform: doesn't matter haven't been gaming much lately anyways
  • Favourite cartoon character: Wonder Woman,The flash,Pidge,Chip,Sunny and Sides,and several other comic characters
  • Personal Quote: That's Soooo-lar!
  • Tools of the Trade: Stuff.....just like everybody else

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Comments


:iconmiharaemiko:
Thanks for the :+fav:s on Baltic's St. Valentines Stamps!! :hug:

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You are the child of god's holy gift of life. You come from me. But you are not me. Your soul and your body are your own, and yours to do with as you wish.

If I :+fav: or :+devwatch: you
FORGIVE ME!
I totally loaded your Message Board! :cries:
:iconmonkey-sama:
Thank you for :+fav: :hug:

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Sorry for my English :blush:
:iconkunai-kitty:
Thanks a lot for the fave!! ^^

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Good or Evil?
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--What if I told you it was Good? What would say?
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--why?
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Proudly a part of ~hetalia-rp!!!
:iconcheektoki:
Thanks For The Watch XD

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2010
:iconakorr:
You're welcome^^' I should warn you I'm like a silent watcher so I may not comment as often as I'd like>.<
:iconcheektoki:
Thanks For The :+fav:

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:star::bulletred::bulletorange::bulletyellow::bulletgreen::bulletblue::bulletpurple::bulletpink:KAWAII:heart:CELEBRITY:bulletred::bulletorange::bulletyellow::bulletgreen::bulletblue::bulletpurple::bulletpink::star:

2010
:iconsnowbean:
Thank you for the fave I apreciate it!

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God did not create evil, there is evil because some people don't have God in their hearts
:icontoadguy:
thanks for the fave~

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:iconthemorbidhobbiest:
:iconthanksforfaving:

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~Weave me the hope of a new tomorrow and fill my cup again~

*avatar by the lovely Kiss-the-Iconist

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